TELL HIM HE'S DREAMING: Rudd hasn't a snowflake's chance in hell of being Leader again

Today’s Canberra Times splash on the highly unlikely prospect of former PM Kevin Rudd returning to his party’s leadership was as inevitable as it is implausible.

Rudd is not going to be Leader again. Senator Doug Cameron and Daryl Melham have stronger prospects of elevation to the top-job.

But the story was inevitable because Rudd does still harbor delusions of restored grandeur despite proving himself to be a highly unsuitable and fundamentally inadequate leader.

He hangs around the Terrace bar, making nice with staffers and scribes, he calls sometimes stunned colleagues out of the blue, he looks in the mirror and see Churchill staring right back at him.

If it wasn’t so serious it would be hilarious.

He needs to do the decent thing and quit. But he won’t and that’s mostly because he is quite convinced that these are his Wilderness Years and that some day soon he’ll return to greatness.

But it’s such an implausible prospect in the caucus that VEXNEWS usually hears laughter when members of our famed Alan Howe-busting Investigations Unit ask about Rudd, his cunning plans and what the future hold.

They gave him their trust, once. His abuse of it has not been forgotten. Or forgiven. They don’t even think he meant it, actually. His unique form of menace and disconnection in relation to colleagues is attributed to demons in his past. A case for Dr Phil perhaps.

Even his only significant backer as the Rudd ship sank, Anthony Albanese, is thought to have built quite a strong working relationship with Gillard and new COS action-man Ben Hubbard in recent months. The departure of Albo mate Lindsay Tanner, who thought poisonous and sometimes envious thoughts for his rival, is thought to have played a role in this.

So who in the caucus would actually back Rudd? There’s said to be nine of them. Of a caucus that’s the best part of a hundred sinning-souls.

Our famed restraint leads us not to want to name and shame them all but is there a significant factional player among them? Barely. A prominent MP whose support would gain attention? No.

Their Rudd-love is reminiscent of battered spouse syndrome. Victims of emotional violence caught in a cycle of denial and misplaced loyalty.

The whole Rudd returns thing is ultimately bull-dust. It’s fair game to report Rudd’s insatiable lust for power but it needs to be seen in its proper context: Labor’s caucus will never get back into bed with one who so thoroughly abused and neglected them in the past.



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25 responses to “TELL HIM HE'S DREAMING: Rudd hasn't a snowflake's chance in hell of being Leader again

  1. Glory

    Nine is better than zero. As long as that nine is more than Shorten, Combet and co have individually Rudd has a chance.

  2. Anonymous

    who are the 9?

  3. Cr Craig

    I prefer 69.

  4. Giuseppe De Simone

    I demand Kevin Rudd back as Prime Minister and Julia Gillard back as his loyal Deputy Prime Minister.

    Why can’t the ALP caucus see that this is in the interests of the country? I think we’ve given the “faceless men deciding the leader” experiment one year and that’s long enough.

    Once Kevin is back in charge, we can have an election just like we were going to have last year so the whole country can decide between him and Tony Abbott for the next Prime Minister. Pity it can’t be a double dissolution election and indeed I believe it can only be an election for the House of Representatives. Very sad.

  5. Danby's last term

    Joe you would wouldn’t you. Hey I demand that Peter Costello be reunited leader of the Liberal Party. Anyone other then Abbott would be good. Maybe it’s time for Julie Bishop to be appointed leader. She holds a swag of votes from WA and is a real contender.

  6. This is Australia not Italy

    Giuseppe. In case you’re not aware we have a parliamentary system here in Australia. The Prime0minister is elected by the parliamentary caucus, as it should be. We do not, thank god, have a directly elected head of government. Its not a case of leaders versus leaders. Its about the overall party. In all assessment the Labor Party has much more talent than the Liberal Front Bench. A ration of two to one I would think.

  7. Mother Mary

    There were discussions that Tanner was the source of the leak that plagued Gillard in the leadup to the 2010 Federal Election. Tanner has had it in for Gillard for many years dating back to AUS days. Gillard showed Tanner loyalty but Tanner never returned it in kind. Gillard and Armed soldiered the troops and ran the Carlton branch whilst Tanner milked the numbers. If it was not for Gerry Hand announcing his departure after the preselection has been finalised the seat of Melbourne would have been placed into the pool to be allocated out. But Hand held back is announcement of retirement buying time and securing Melbourne for the left.

    Just look at the mess that tanner left the seat of Melbourne in. If he had of remained maybe the ALP would have held on to the seat., Maybe he jumped before he was rejected. Three failed marriages and support for a losing football team. All talk little substance.

  8. Giuseppe and This is Australia not Italy,

    When Australians go to the polls they vote for people, individuals, who are responsible for re-presenting the will of their local community, re-presenting your will. Only the uneducated masses vote for political parties or their leaders. Political parties weren’t even mentioned in the Constitution until the 1970’s when the term was slipped in the backdoor via the 1977 blitzrieg referendum (Amendment 6: 1977 Casual Vacancies). Simple lesson with referendum questions – always vote NO, you can’t go wrong.

    Even with an ignorant swill of voters Rudd hasn’t got a chance in hell of becoming PM again. He is a psychopathic dud of the highest order.

  9. Giuseppe De Simone

    Dear Mother Mary.

    Lindsay Tanner was nearly as good a finance minister as Senator Walsh. He did a bit of a fiddle here and a bit of a fiddle there with the figures as he has admitted so he wasn’t totally upfront. However, he served the people of Australia very well and was probably the most competent of the gang of four. Australia’s parliament is much the poorer because he is no longer there.

    The leaks in relation to Gillard in cabinet purporting to show a modicum of fiscal responsibility by questioning unsustainable increases in government expenditure would not have come from Tanner as he is a loyal and faithful party member. We will need to wait 28 more years before those papers are released to find out what is the truth but it was never a real story.

    Tanner was a member of the broad ALP left in the Australian Union of Students. Gillard was supported by trotskyites, communists and radical feminists. She was opposed by the ALP right, the ALP left, the Liberal Students, the Christian moderate students and the Australian Democrat supporters! Basically, the whole of the mainstream political movement was against her.

    She was elected as part of the continuation of the domination of the Australian Union of Students by extremists or those who travelled with them. The political extremists were the “management” grouping in AUS and held power through delegates who did not face election on smaller campuses that were their stronghold.

    I know this because I was a Liberal Student fighting the communists in a broad coalition of democratically minded students. In the end even the ALP right decided AUS was unable to be reformed and we moved to dismantle the organisation.

    Despite her extremist supporters, my view remains unchanged – Gillard was then and is now a real conservative. She just pretends to be a radical. She was a student lefty because they were the management. The real radicals were the Liberal Students who wanted to implement voluntary student unionism and reform student organisations to be responsive to their membership.

    Compared to Gillard, Lindsay Tanner was far more reformist in his orientation as he wanted AUS to be reflective of the mainstream of student political views and not the small number of student activists. He supported democratic reforms. If he had been successful, AUS might still be around today as it would have been a much more representative organisation and therefore more difficult for Liberal Students to demolish.

    I quite like the Real Gillard. I respect her real values, not the lies she expresses now-a-days. She does believe in the inate worth of the individual, freedom of expression, the dignity of work and the triumph of knowledge over ignorance. That’s why it pains me that she appears incapable of leading. This is a result of the compromises she had to make to become leader by getting the ALP right wing and left wing unions to fall in behind her. Then she needed to make even more compromises to win the Greens over. The Greens are the Trotskyites of the Parliament, economic Neanderthals who would reduce us to living in caves with fig leaves for clothing (we couldn’t use animal skins because animals are sacred).

    The decent thing after the inconclusive 2010 election would have been for Gillard to form a caretaker government for six months pending a new election.

    Dear Racist (This is Australia not Italy) You are a stupid stupid person and a gutless wonder who hides behind a pseudonym.

    I am proud of my Italian heritage and I am proud of being an Australian. However, my Italian background is not relevant to my opinions and you have used it to denigrate me, my values and my beliefs.

    I know the caucus elects the parliamentary leader you twit. That’s why I called on the caucus to see that it was in the interests of the country to do so.

    You are entitled to your opinion that the ALP has more talent even if it is not correct. I don’t agree with you and the public seem to agree with me if the opinion polls are correct. The real test will be when the Liberals take government and start to fix the mess created by this mob.

  10. Mitchell Observer

    Well, the Red Queen is taking Labor over the precipice.
    Gillard’s polling is worse than anything for which Rudd was held responsible.
    So what was the rationale for removing Rudd and what is the rationale for sticking with Julia?
    She has reached the ‘people are not listening’ point, ‘the people are waiting, with baseball bats, on their verandahs’ point in the political cycle.
    Arbib, Howes…boys, the lady is gone!

  11. Greensborough Growler

    It’s interesting you say Caucus took time to catch up with Latham being electoral poison until well after the election execution.

    However, Rudd is popular with the punters and the ones most antagonistic to him are his colleagues. Could be another case of the Caucus being out of tune with popular opinion.

    Rudd could get there if say Feb 2013, Gillard is terminal. Which of the brave pretenders would be willing to put up their hands for a shellacking later in the year.

    Rudd might get there because others are too scared to taint their brand.

  12. et tu Brutei

    Nö Leader will ever be safe as long as they have the “loyal” support of little Willie Shortpants.

    And for those that think he might himself be a leader, they should have a good look in his closet.

    In any case, an egomaniac who has betrayed so many will surely not get the loyalty from his colleagues that he has denied them.

  13. Brimbank Party hack

    The way the ALP is going it would not surprise me to see Kevin back as the Fuehrer.By next election the Voters will do a NSW and leave that few Party hacks that those nine will be enough to re-elect him.

  14. Southerner

    Where will this country and the ALP be after another 12 months of Julia?

    Can this Govt do anything right! This country is heading down the toilet. This has to be the worst Govt since Whitlam – maybe worse as he at least he had charisma and believed in something.

    The alliance with the Greens is lethal as is the leadership.

    The ALP is at 31%, in 12 months they could easily be in the mid 20s especially with Julia there.

    Maybe Rudd would do better. He has at least performed credibly as Foreign Minister, especially over Libya and he was good on TV during the Queensland floods. But how could he come back? Who else is there?

  15. Ben

    Cr Craig – you’re a shocker.

    Returning to Rudd: I can also assure readers that he won’t be lowering the sea levels.

    That’s a promise.

  16. Anonymous

    Shorten better knock Gillard off soon, otherwise he will never be PM. The way the polls are going the chosen one is destined to spend the rest of his career in opposition.

  17. Anonymous

    Shorten better knock Gillard off soon, otherwise he will never be PM. The way the polls are going the chosen one is destined to spend the rest of his career in opposition…

  18. Doot doot boy

    Doesn’t matter who knock Gillard off. Labor are not going to win the next election unless Abbott does something exceptionally stupid.

  19. Aseop

    The next election is two years away. Neither side of politics should be focusing on polls.

  20. Sandy Greenstreet

    Andy, can you tell us something about the ratbag who called Julia a racist. He looked as though he had problems of some sort. Surely you can find out. Julia should not worry as Howard was accused of being a racist often enough and each time it improved his vote. Australian do not like such extremism.

  21. Joy Freeth

    Rintoul has to be a Trotskyite!


    Gillard the deluded living in a state of denial about her hopeless government that is devoid of authoratative leadership and is in a policy disaster zone( re eg the refugees and also the carbon tax)!
    ah well Mr Shorten, Senator Farell, Mark Arbib, Paul Howes and all the Gillard supporters and anti- KRudd plotters whats your next dumb move?? Better still shorten Gillards leadership and get the likes of a Paul Keating back, as desperate times call for sound moves! ALP brought this mess on themselves and the public have lost patience with Gillard so she has to go ASAP!

  23. Kevin 017 ?

    Note Kevin Rudd’s words – Julia will be Labor leader UNTIL the next election…

    watch out then….

  24. cynic

    The sad thing is, jooles chased the top job for so long, and some who know her background can say that openly, and when she got it she has stuffed things up so badly and it’s all self inflicted. One so bright but so dumb at the same time. Bloody hopeless.

  25. Maintain the Rage

    The leak that plagued Gillard in the run to the 2010 Election?…you meant the one where she questioned the pension increases (while not blinking at throwing $ Billions on School Halls?)

    There’s no way questioning a Pension Increase is ever justified since it gives something back to a generation of retired Aussies who paid tax all their working lives….

    Lest of all coming from a Deputy PM of the Labor Party for damn sake! How she could even consider questioning challenging this principle…tough talker with the pensioners! yet gets walked over when by the mining sector when real push-back is needed!

    The ALP, all about the politics of style over substance…

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