ONLY IN MELBOURNE: Lefty house of worship under siege by militant Lev Lafayette who promises “executive expediency” and plans to hock Church property to expand his empire

levlafayette Lev Lafayette, a one-time lefty activist and perpetual student once revealed in our predecessor publication as being engaged in the production of erotic videos during his horny undergraduate days, has re-emerged as a central figure in a plot to takeover an asset-rich left-wing house of worship, the Unitarian Church in inner-city East Melbourne.

A member of the VEXNEWS Investigation with a long-running interest in the quirky church has been provided has obtained a number of documents that make it clear that Lafayette plans to takeover the Church and institute radical new policies that his opponents fear could destroy the old institution that has existed for many decades.

ASSET-RICH
Long-time members fear that the apparently fully-employed Lafayette “has his eyes” on the multi-million dollar property assets of the Church and plans on his using what he’s so far learned studying an MBA (Technology Management) at the Chifley Business School to take inappropriate risks with the asset base that will almost certainly include taking on large amounts of debt in a quest to expand the church.

Church insiders say Lafayette claims financial expertise he doesn’t have to make inaccurate declarations about the state of the asset-rich Church organisation. In his policy document that we have obtained he claims the church is making “significant losses” but doesn’t mention this is principally due to a new method of calculating depreciation (a non-cash item) on the Church’s assets. In truth, insiders say, the Church’s real estate assets are rapidly appreciating – not declining – in value, something not reflected in its financial statements but no less true because of it.

THE CHURCH OF THE LEFTY NON-BELIEVER
The Church – which extends its hospitality to atheists – is a small ‘l’ liberal church in the United States. Its Melbourne chapter is perhaps even more so, with the parts of faith that are deemed “supernatural” mostly rejected by adherents, with some equating historical figures like Fidel Castro with Jesus Christ and so on. Lev Lafayette’s agenda is designed to shake-up the organisation to not only make it more radical but to take a dictatorial approach with its governance that is seen by his opponents as potentially wrecking all they’ve built.

Recent sermons include ‘Rise of Atheism’, a presentation by the Colombian Food Workers Union on ‘May Day is all about workers rights’, anarchist Joe Toscano demanding the creation of a people’s bank, denunciations of genetically modified foods and so on. Sounds like a few Uniting Church franchises in the inner-city.

A prospective talk on “‘Red Jesus – Fascist Paul” will no doubt excite keen interest.

But Lafayette think the Church is stuck in a rut and is not radical enough.

Lafayette’s plans include changing the name of the Church, stacking the organisation full of his supporters, expanding to the eastern suburbs with a possible mortgage on the existing property to support the purchase of another, the replacement of the Church bible with a Jefferson Bible that strips out most of the original content, radical new voting procedures for the election of the Church hierarchy, and most ominously more “executive expediency.”

The latter is a particularly curious – if not Stalinist – campaign commitment and makes it clear that Lafayette would be a much less consultative Church leader than previous lefties who’ve been Chairperson.

STACKS ON
Insiders say Lafayette has stacked the Church with new members who will blindly support him, regardless of the risks to the asset-base or the organisation. It is not known whether this will be enough for him to roll the current Chairman, a former union official, Peter Abrehart.

A controversial figure in the Church, Diane Anderson, who once terrorised the Higgins based membership of the ALP, has since left for her American homeland to so far unsuccessfully seize control of her mother’s estate although was previously aligned with Lafayette.

That close association is thought by many Church members to reflect on his judgment as she was considered a highly divisive figure before being expelled by the Church for heresy in a move that still causes old-timers to chuckle or shake their heads with dismay about how far they had to go to get rid of her.

The election will be held on the 26th of September.

Advertisements

7 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

7 responses to “ONLY IN MELBOURNE: Lefty house of worship under siege by militant Lev Lafayette who promises “executive expediency” and plans to hock Church property to expand his empire

  1. “.. once revealed in our predecessor publication as being engaged in the production of erotic videos during his horny undergraduate days”

    That’s very silly and prurient remark. The only possible thing you could be referring to is a somewhat arthouse student film that contained less nudity than a ABC drama.

    “… will almost certainly include taking on large amounts of debt in a quest to expand the church.”

    Good lord no. I favour a balanced budget, as stated in my pledge to members.

    “.. and most ominously more “executive expediency.”

    Tragically, the CoM doesn’t delegate its powers. That is what is meant by that remark. As a result it is simultaneously inefficient and not particularly democratic.

    “Insiders say Lafayette has stacked the Church with new members who will blindly support him”

    There is not one full member of the Church (with the exception of myself, obviously) whom I have brought in – not one!

    I would be more impressed if you would care to mention some of the other statements in the pledge – such as the term limits for members of the committee of management, to include more religiously-informed attention to secular issues, and outreach to the local community and liberal religious students.

    I am somewhat surprised that you have a problem with this.

  2. VEXNEWS

    An unusually erudite response to a VEXNEWS takedown. Kudos.

  3. Less Erudite

    Has this guy ever had a proper job? He just seems to be like a bloody locust, dormant for awhile and then popping up as a one man plague somewhere. I really loathe these self important types who really don’t stand for very much at all but for constantly seeking forums where they can spread the narcissism a little more widely, sort of a “I love me and now I will give you the opportunity to love me to.” Very strange creature.

  4. Anonymous

    Is this the guy tht didnt pay a train ticket and went to court against the state government?

  5. Walter Plinge

    “Figures can’t lie – but liars can figure”. Nothing to see here — a perfectly legitimate Standards-approved move. Only you have to be an accountant to be able to understand it.

  6. House of Apostasy

    If true, it just confirms my own opinion of leftists as self seeking, greedy authoritarians.

    But, couldn’t happen to a nicer “church”. Next can he move in on Macnab at St Michaels and “mortgage” them to the suburbs too? They’ve got even better assets and would not be missed by many.

  7. Labor left set to take power

    It is a laugh that labor lefty tries to take control of small inner city ‘church’ just as labor left is about to be exterminated by greens. Brumby feeney and shorten are relaxed and comfortable with this. Carr looking forward to his incredible shrinking faction to be run by a handful of Greeks and developer mates. Keep it small and keep it simple is the new way for the every shrinking labor left.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s