They’ll never pay back their $2 billion in debt like this folks.
One of the many friends of VEXNEWS – a Demons supporter regrettably – has just sent us this extraordinary email – see below. We mentioned only the other day that the age was fluffing up its circulation with deals to the Melbourne and StKilda footy club membership bases, but we didn’t know that the level of discount offered was so, well, desperate.Â This email is the proof you need to understand once and for all that VEWXNEWS isn’t conducting a vendetta against the Age – we’re just reporting the facts.
Read the email below and do the sums for yourself:Â The offer gives you a copy of the age every Friday (cover price $1.50), Saturday ($2.40), Sunday ($2) and Monday ($1.50) for a full 52 weeks of the year, for just $25.Â Let’s make this clear.Â That’s $7.40 worth of papers times 52 weeks, or $384.80 worth of papers for $25, or in other words, a discount of 93.5%.Â
But wait, there’s more.Â A full $15 from that $25 is going to be donated back to the club as well, which makes the actual discount a mind-blowing 97.5%.Â Why don’t they just give them away and save themselves the trouble of collecting an amount of cash that, frankly, won’t make the slightest difference to their massive debt load?Â
Something is very wrong down at Spencer Street when they have to resort to this kind of marketing.Â What will the Fairfax marketing geniuses think of next?Â Paying people to read their paper?Â Free car with every paper sold for full price?
FOOTNOTE: Our resident newspaper expert advises us that, technically, it’s not possible to give away newspapers for free and still count those papers towards quarterly circulation figures. We get it now. So, clearly they would be giving them away for free if they could, judging by this desperate tactic.Â Which raises two questions: how long can they continue to do this for and still survive?Â And how long can they continue to do this before the small handful of people who pay full price find out and as Terry Clark would have said get mighty, mighty pussed-off?Â