Key figures in the office of Victorian Opposition Leader Ted Baillieu have been accused by Liberal insiders of engaging in the illegal and creepy act of “downblousing”, taking photographs down the tops of unsuspecting female passers-by from the balcony of the Leader’s office at 157 Spring Street.
VEXNEWS has learned that Baillieu media adviser and notoriously urbane pantsman Paul Price is the principal figure of suspicion in the perv scandal, as he allegedly takes photographs from the balcony of many people as they walk past the building.
Witnesses this week sitting outside the European restaurant saw Price – once known as the Pink Panther – and a number of offsiders taking photographs from the balcony, itself directly visible from the office of Michael Kapel, Baillieu’s chief of staff and principal liaison with Baillieu’s spiritual guide, Petro Georgiou.
“Downblousing is just as intrusive and just as illegal as up-skirting”, one legal expert explained to VEXNEWS. “If it’s going on at Ted Baillieu’s office, the Police really should be notified. It’s disgusting.”
THE PRICE IS NOT RIGHT
VEXNEWS understands that Price spends a lot of time out on the Baillieu balcony, smoking, plotting and scheming. In between those engagements, witnesses say he has been taking pervy photos of women in the street and also at a nearby rooftop bar where Price was once asked to leave after a dispute involving a leather-clad companion, his cigar and some lipstick.
It’s not the first time South Yarra resident Price has been in trouble with the ladies or the law, according to someone familiar with his exploits. “He puts the animal in party animal, no doubt about it,” one jealous observer claimed this morning.
“He is the John Belushi of the Baillieu faction. Although unlike Belushi, we hear he kicked the party drugs habit before it killed him. Good job.”
“But he is – as you would say – a pants man par excellence. There’s no stopping him. He’s a cock in a henhouse. He is a man of many addictions. What Police would find in his Louis Vuitton handbag would be enough to sustain multiple criminal convictions in my view. If he’s taking dirty pics from the balcony, that’s certainly a new low.”
GET BUSY DELETING BIG BOY
Another concerned friend said “Hopefully after reading your splash he can delete them all (the pics) from his mobile phone and camera in a way that no authorities could recover from the memory of either. Otherwise he could be locked up with the prison pervs for quite some time.”
Critics say the entertaining and enterprising Price is “try-sexual” in the sense that he would try any gender or anyone any time in a desperate attempt to spread his seed.
Hopefully he can confine the fun in his pockets to more traditional and more lawful pursuits.